I hate thinking up titles...

Well, I talked to him and he says he has no idea who called CPS on me, but I know that it would have to be someone in his family. Only one of them has ever been to my house and that was a long time ago. I'm never going to be comfortable around his family E.V.E.R. again. Which is horrible because they are so nice, but that in itself, is what makes it so much worse!! How can they be so nice to me and then go behind my back like that without even getting the whole story from ME?!

We talked for a couple hours Saturday night. I ended up going on and on about things he probably didn't need, nor want, to know. Things like how messed up my hormones are since I got preggo and how extremely crazy I get every month. He said he would take it as a warning. I told him he was smart.

I think he just lets me talk and talk and talk because he thinks I'll forget what I was talking about initially, but that doesn't happen when it's something serious, I'll just keep going back to it until I get the response I'm looking for. He'll learn.

We went over to his house yesterday evening with the thought that we would go see some hot air balloons at the balloon festival. But, no. I had him make her dinner so she could eat when we got there and then we did nothing. I mentioned going to the park and he shot that idea down saying it was going to be dark soon. So, essentially, I went over there so let him make her dinner. Granted, we did play outside for a little bit and she actually went down her castle slide that he got her for her birthday, but that was not why we went over there!

So, I had him drive us back home a little early because all of his brother's friends came over to watch the football game. I was slightly annoyed that they already knew The Baby. I know it's irrational, but I hate the thought of her being around people that I have never met before. Cause I am that overprotective mom that her (boy)friends *hack cough spit* are going to hate when she gets older.

I didn't say a word the whole ride home, (Excuse me a moment while I go pull my daughter back inside through the doggie door that she sees as an escape route... and a great way to hide things, like my cell phone!!) which is unusual for me because, as I mentioned indirectly earlier, I'm a pretty big talker. I could talk til your ear falls off and runs away. About nothing in particular at all. I take one statement and turn it into an hour long conversation that touches on so many different subjects that all you can do is smile and nod because there is no way you re going to get a word in edgewise unless I ask you a direct question, and even then, I might cut you off by starting on a whole other tangent.

Anyways, I let him come in and do the bedtime routine with her and then walked him to the door and walked outside with him and turned on the porch light. It was obvious he wouldn't be leaving just yet. We talked for a little bit. He says he feels worse about talking the S.C. without asking than he does about drinking alcohol while he was supposed to be watching the baby. He actually mentioned that it wasn't such a big deal because she was asleep and that he wouldn't have done it had she been awake. Which makes me think that he would do it again given the opportunity.

I told him to look me in the eyes and promise me that he would never drink around the baby again. He said it numerous times, but could not look me in the eyes the whole time he was saying it. So I don't know how much I believe him. Although I have known people who could look you directly in the eyes and outright lie to you, so I'm not sure I would still believe him either way.

Someone asked me the other day if I had ever thought of trying to date him. The thought has crossed my mind, once or twice. Whenever he comes over looking especially nice. Or when he's just gotten out of the shower because he had just finished working when he calls me to bring her over.... *daydream* but I'm afraid it's a really BAD idea. I just know that we would have a bad breakup and be so uncomfortable around each other for the next 17+ years.

Although, last night, when I told him that we would never drink together unless we had someone responsible for watching the baby, he became slightly distraught and then said, "Okay, so we would have to have a babysitter!"

He has, on occasion, said things to make me think he would be interested, because, well, lets be serious here, who wouldn't be interested in me!! Okay, so maybe I wasn't being serious. ;) I think, had the circumstances been different when we met, we probably could have had a nice relationship that would have ended rather prematurely because of my need to be in control of E.V.E.R.ything.

I'll bet you anything that he'd have been long gone by now if I wasn't the girl who had his baby.